I’m Afraid You Won’t Understand

I don’t look at you, I stare
The tiny moment when you are there
Everything about you I want to capture
In my mind, without you, there’s despair.

I can feel the air around you
Feel the sunlight touch your lips
The hair that’s so beautifully untied
And your hand that’s on your hips.

The smile you smiled was precious,
I remember it even today
The millions of times you crossed my path
& the times I made you wait

I spoke to you on the phone,
When I dreamt and when I was awake,
All the things I felt for you
Is in the chest deep locked away

Thrown away at the horizon
Now I’ve got nothing to say

You didn’t want to hear a word,
I would have never again taken the chance
I killed this Romeo’s poem
‘cause I’m afraid you won’t understand.

Someday I'll fly

Unaware, I fly, the winds take me high
This horizon’s new, so is surreal sky
Transcend new boundaries, test new winds
Ignorance rests as I flutter my wings

Birds of a feather, lost in the weather
Not a clue about the rule or the sun
But the birds are tough and glad together
Can get the things they want, done.

My seeking is unique; distance, inevitable
I am what I need, taking chance is debatable
Gambled I have with caution and heart
Tangled in a mosaic of interests and scars

There’s no answer to the gaping questions
That havent been forgotten, but never been asked
I wonder about the petty confessions
And wander about abandoned paths

I’ll need some time to think this through
To swallow and stomach distasteful rue
These wings will get me strong again
I’ll master the pyrotechnics one day

‘cross the mountains, past the sky
I’ll fly right; zoom past over July
I’ll fly above the clouded gloom
Where the tears don’t fall; above the hues

My blood and tears will have earned the price
I’ll be at peace, when I close my eyes.

I’ve Learnt Not To Dream Again

Broken dreams hurt so much
I’ve learnt not to dream again

They say the path is untrodden
So hard your hopes will shatter
It’s too much pain, better look away
Even though the alternatives don’t matter

I’ve learnt not to dream again

They say better don’t hope, don’t train
Excel in things we want you to
Achievers have some advantage,
Plus they train harder than you can ever do
And when the pieces of my heart in blue
Yearns to keep the spirit alive
I’ve learnt to deal with expectations
And never to dream of the open skies

A contentious mind, a hardened heart
Won’t fail me this time, with my eyes on the path
It’ll be work and strive, all in the moment’s time
And when there occurs a small spark in the rain
I’ll blow it off and won’t ever dream again.

Not going the distance

It’s been so long I’ve given a damn
It’s hard to care anymore.
I stand so tall after all the clamber,
Can’t bend and reach out anymore.

I keep my differences aside
I can mingle and blend like wine
But I keep my distances marked
You can’t come further I’m locked
With me forgetting the combination,
I can’t be unlocked anymore.

With just passing time, people close in
Now I’ve got the favours and the burden roped in
Personally being professional, I follow
The codes with the procedure’s blueprint

This charade gets me, and the wall’s cracks appear
I can peep through the other side, but not get near
With barely visible parts of joys and sorrows
I don’t get the entire picture anymore

But I dream, one day, will bless me
& crush the bricks to pieces
I hope my archers and cavalry
Will be prepared for the people who seek us
Till that time, I’ll count my dimes
But I can’t wait for my life anymore.

I'm So Happy To Be Alone

I'm so happy to be left alone, in my own world I live
I'm so happy to be alone, the songs I want to, I sing
I take my own stride, I tread my own path
I'm so happy to be alone, I like my light and my dark

No illusions to fool, on the values I'm firm
I know I can't reap, if the seeds I haven't sown
Good head on my shoulder, higher mountains to reach
The thoughts that do smolder, almost surfeit

I'm so happy to be alone, on nobody I vent my fire
I'm so happy to be alone, I can express my own desire
I team up with solitude and my thoughts I do chase
My solitude abandons me in a state of malaise

The desire for somebody, almost doesn't exist
This idea of dependency seems defeatist
I yearn and I cringe, to this feeling, cold, unknown
I was happy and intend to be, I'm better off alone

Now I find myself, not the way I was before
Something changed unintentionally, I'm feeling little sore
The priorities changed, so did the things aspired
The bittersweet feeling has got my heart in a mire

I shrug it off with a laugh, now I'm back up on my feet
Wary of my learning and how things could change and be
Wiser and agile now I jump over quick sands
Careful in foreign lands, spare a thought on where I stand

I'm so happy to be alone, till I find no longer the need
Of a freewheeling life, the one without a key
I'm so happy to be alone, but I'll digress, this much, I owe me
I'm so happy to be alone, perfect solitude and not lonely.