Goodbye January 2015

Say goodbye to the month that passed
The days so long but the month didn't last
Twelve long ones with twelve hour days
Cannot imagine; I should probably make hay

"Make haste, make do, make all you can"
But I'm doing more than what's my day span
Somewhere along still missing the point
Something went wrong while flipping the coin

Before the second installment begins
A day to reflect; to think, not give in
A stop to the long train of thoughts, until
Mopped up what's bled, coagulate and heal.

This tiny spark by irreplaceable spark
Shall pave the way for the fire in dark
Life's a never ending transition phase
But for now I rest my eyes and case!

As written on 01-feb-2015

X-mas 2014

Hang out the stockings,
Pray to the lord,
Let Santa shower
His magic on all

Let the fun and frolic
Celebrations and treats
Fill the space under the Christmas tree

May your stockings be filled
On the morrow
May your chimney way have a big enough hollow
For Santa to enter and exit
In a jiffy
He isn't going to forget you, is he!

May the carols pave way
For a better new year
May the merriness make
The eve endeared

To all in here I say this much
Wish you all a merry Christmas!!

Losing sleep

I never thought I would lose my sleep
But all these thoughts I cannot keep,
Inside, my head there's a thunderstorm,
That rains on hope and thoughts warm.

Craving for a little piece of sunshine,
As darkness envelops my delirious mind
A ray of hope, a symbol or sign
Maybe only intervention divine

Can save me now, for the bugle's sounded
The chip on my shoulder, is fairly astounded
through this wringer I must go again,
A war of rules, clash of minds restrained

A fairly average game to lose,
I so did not want my life confused,
Where is that star I used to see,
Alas the sky is growing weak,

I look across the horizons spread
The stars they fade, there's the sun instead
How long have I been gazing by
And searched in the wrong part of the sky

How long have I been pushing the bend,
The dead end I didn't think to mend
My ways, I missed the turn somewhere,
Looking back and the darkness glares

Destiny they say are made by choices,
When silence get replaced by voices,
The decision now has to be made,
To stare the wall, or gaze the ray

Of sunlight that marks my new way
Maybe this will take me away
From the dread, that's filled up to the seams
Maybe one night will help me sleep

Invisible chain

Twisting and turning
With my thoughts unsettled
Like a very hot fire
Under a burning kettle

These ideas, they stew, they boil and they cook
At the end of my wits, everywhere I've looked

A way is what I need right now, one desperate move
Or it will be checkmate again guessing nothing new

I refuse to go down without a fight
Most certainly I refuse to go down
I may hide, find ways to bide my time
Soul searching, this soul is well bestowed

At times I falter, I fall down
Get bogged by invisible chains
These chains that tie my thoughts and heart,
my hands and legs and brain

They seem impossible to be unshackled
How can I begin to try?
Among the ridicule and cruel heckle
It makes me want to cry

It makes me want to give up
this fight, You, can have it all
All the mud slings gory
All the glory and awards

But something stirs inside
How can I let it be?
How can I let myself be trapped
With bitter memories?
How can something as trivial
As bitter conjectures
Shackle everything I know
Time for my deflector

These imaginary bonds
Shall be put to test
All Chinese whispers and whisperers
Shall be put to rest

And all the demons in my head
All of them will be slayed
They say it is a nightmare
Of dreams I'm not afraid

It's time to take a silent moment
With conviction I must move
Not let this break my swagger
This moment I shall use

To rise above the clouds
My own standards be surpassed
Things need to be set right
In stone nothing's cast.

But the horse has to die

A dreary path and rustic breeze
To this I didn't agree
For speed and strength I'm sought
After all, I am that horse

The one who befriends the rider
And goes on without a sigh
Even when the sands are wider
Than what seems, the sky

I push my limits ahead
No complains, no pit stops
My friend my master forgets
Soon all shall be lost

Enter: the camel, made for dunes
My fellow, my counter part,
He groans and grieves and makes the halt, when he thinks he should stop

He goes on for days and nights for he's accepted and well rested
Now I struggle to take a step
My limits are well tested

A traitor, they say, as I drop
Drop down on my knees
What good a horse that knows not
Itself, if forgets to breathe

The rider's friend, companion
Shall now be bid goodbye
The rider will survive
But the horse has to die.

Sense

I wish I could make some sense
Of things before they could start
I wish there was no difference
With matters of mind and heart

I wish they were united
The conquest for red and green
A shame when I decided
Only to one I must agree

Another way is required
This path has been long tread
But what has been desired
Is so lost inside my head

I try and try to recollect
What is that thing I'd thought?
Now I doubt my intellect
Good reason beyond a doubt

I recognize this one pattern
The cycles of night and day
Never do they take a wild turn
It's time to shut the drapes

Some things have got to change
Damned, if I knew what
Some things best remembered
And some just plain forgot.

The goodnight song

It's time to stop, time to breathe
Stop running, it's time to sleep
Ran hard as I could
Now catching my breath
It's time to stop
Watching my step

The bones then clutter
Slowly rumble
With pride I began
Then slowly humbled

It's time for this one
To rest and sleep
To turn into a lion
From being a sheep

The resilience comes
After the fall
Where one ends,
New chapters evolve

But now I close my eyes
And dream
Of stars and skies and
Happy things
And pray the lord
To give me sight
To wield my pen
And spread the light.